How to Effectively Deal with Situations and Events You Can’t Control

By Sharon Moore on May 15, 2017

Here’s one fact: There are many things in your life you can control. But there’s another fact: Some things are just way beyond your control. And here is where most of us struggle with. We know that sometimes, we can’t prevent some things from happening. But we worry about them anyway. Some of us fret about everything and anything, from death to natural calamities and disasters and deadly diseases. This unreasonable fear sips through us and often drain our energy. As a result, we feel terrible and become unproductive and inefficient. 

If you have the habit of worrying about things you cannot control, here are some things you can do: 

Recognise things that you can control. 

The next time you find yourself worrying too much, take a minute to determine the things and situations you can control. For instance, you can’t prevent a storm from coming but you can be prepared for it. You can’t prevent economic inflation but you can find ways and opportunities to earn and save more. You can’t reverse the fact that your family has history of a chronic disease but you can start adopting a healthy lifestyle and improving your health. Acknowledging that some things are indeed out of your control is essential to stop excessive worrying. But if you find it hard to do so, focus on those things you have power over instead. 

Stop ruminating. Begin problem-solving.  

Many people deal with worry by ruminating. That isn’t an effective strategy. In fact, it is very harmful. Choose to solve the problem rather than ruminate about it. If you find yourself engaged in negative thoughts, ask yourself if what you are thinking is productive. If yes, get up and focus on something else, until you forget about rumination. If you are trying to solve a problem, keep working on solutions until you reach success. 

Learn to manage stress effectively. 

A stressed mind is prone to worrying and ruminating. So make stress management a priority. Exercise regularly, eat well, sleep well, and make time for yourself. You need to find ways to keep your stress levels in check so your mind and body operate efficiently. In addition to these healthy habits, consider meditation, yoga and other mindfulness practices to strengthen your body’s immunity against stress.  

Identify your fears. 

Identify what you are really afraid of happening. Often, the worst-case scenario isn’t as bad as you expect it to be.  Divert your energy to being prepared for the bad things that may possibly happen, and not on worrying itself. This way, you can put your energy into things that are more productive. 

Develop healthy mantras. 

Instead of telling yourself “I can’t do it”, or “I am a failure”, say something good and uplifting to yourself. Say “It may be difficult, but I can do it.” “I may experience failures in my journey, but at the end I will succeed.” 

A tiny amount of worrying is actually good for you. But go overboard and your health and well-being get compromised. With these simple tips, you can learn to effectively control your fears and worries and translate your energy into things that are productive, healthy and positive.

@Copyright 2017 by All Rights Reserved 

Featured Practitioner: James Ward Dip ’ C MBACP

Other Practitioners: Counselling Liverpool

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